You mean... this is all I have to say? So many clever pick-up lines, wasted.

Guy: Wanna go make out?
Girl: Okay.

- The SUB, overheard by Karen.

60% of the time, this prof is right every time.

Prof: There's a 20% difference between the population of girls and boys in China right now. So let's say 50% of the population were girls, then 70% would be boys.

- History class, overheard by Taylor.

Stop thinking about glue, or they'll kill us all!

Girl: Horses can, like, read your mind.

- Creative writing class, overheard by Emily.

They traded, he's the new capital.

A guy is talking about the crisis in North Korea.

Girl: Who's Pyongyang? I thought that Kim guy was the leader, what happened to him?

- The bus loop, overheard by Nina.

You're both wrong, it's clearly Dustin Diamond.

Guy: Oh, come on, he's like a universal sex symbol!
Girl: What? Steve Urkel?
Guy: No! Ben Stiller!

- Outside Vanier, overheard by Julie

The sweet mysteries of life.

Character in Jesus Christ, Vampire Hunter: Where are all the lesbians?
Guy: I ask myself that question every day.

- The Norm, overheard by Julie

If there's more than a dozen, the correct term is "Friday night at Totem."

Guy: Dude, that doesn't count as an orgy. There were too many people.

- On the way to Totem, overheard by Alena

It's okay, you'll earn more tips.

Guy: I've been naked in front of a lot of people before... but that's a lot of people!

- Outside Buchanan A, overheard by Hilary.

Or the cigarette before the execution.

Girl: Riding the bus to school in the morning is like the calm before the storm.

- #41 bus, overheard by Kimberley.